I’m Going to be a Millionaire

Real quick, I wanna clear something up for anyone out there with a skewed misconception of what missionary work is like now. It’s not horrible. It’s no harder than it was before Covid. And honestly, it’s a straight BLAST to be a missionary during a global pandemic and political unrest! Like yeah, times are hard for other people, but as a missionary….

We’re living the dream out here. We’re having the best day every day.

The amount of people who are having hard times has skyrocketed, which means we have more people who are willing to listen to us!! It’s so sick. Not really for them, because their lives are falling apart, but that was gonna happen sooner or later anyway. (They don’t have the gospel)

So to sum everything I just said up: Being a missionary is literally super awesome, don’t be thinking I’m not having a ball out here. No need to trip.

But anyway, as for the things of this week, let’s start with my man Jeff. Now, let me take you back to Tuesday, when Elder Grace and I were raking some leaves for people. We’re doing what rake boys do, and raking up a storm. And then this guy comes walking up, wearing clothes that haven’t been washed since 2018 and a backpack that’s just filled to the brim. I didn’t know what was about to happen, but I knew it was going to be good. And then he did what I never expected… He pulled a gun on us. No not really, he actually offered to help us with the leaves! I think I would’ve been less surprised with the gun, not gonna lie. But he took some of the bags of leaves and tossed ’em in the dumpster for us, and I was like, “Yo this guy’s pretty nice!”

And then he told us how to start a pyramid scheme.

I wasn’t ready for that part. He never called it a “pyramid scheme,” right? Because that’s how it fails. You can’t let people know it’s a scheme. But anyway, he described the exact process of starting one, and how both Elder Grace and I could become millionaires. And as solid as his advice was, one has to wonder why he doesn’t just do that himself… So his credibility was a bit lacking for my taste.

And then when he went to leave, we asked him where he was going, and he told us that he was going to “Pray to mom in spirit, and the clouds would tell him.” Because apparently he had done that earlier and the clouds spelled out the word “South”, and that’s how he knew to come help us with the leaves… Like the whole word South. We asked him and he confirmed that’s what he saw. So wild.

But that was kinda it, as far as exciting things go. We’re having a great time, living the dream, and serving people. But it’s the 18th today… The exact day… So we have our usual…..

MONTHLY RAFFLE:

Maybe you won. Maybe you didn’t. Only one way to find out….

But that’s all I got for you guys, have a killer week!

Over and Out

SHOUTOUTS:

  • Jantzen – She was just out here serving in Oklahoma, but she finished her mission and rolled out. She’s a legend, and now she’s gonna be going to college in Utah, which is where 96% of the people I talk to out here are going, so it’s pretty cool. Just an all-around good person.
  • Martin Luther King Jr – This guy was like, “Yo, let’s all just get along, regardless of what skin color we have.” And now here we are. What a legend, it’s too bad there are still racist people out there. Don’t be racist. It’s that easy.