The Dynamic Trio
Yes, I am indeed in a trio. So instead of 1 companion, I get 2! Whoop to the dee do! And it’s actually quite a whoop-able moment because Elder Marler and Elder Spillman are both really awesome.
Elder Spillman:
- Gets slices of turkey stuck on top of the room fan
- Sings Disney songs in the shower
- Practiceshis old competitivedances
- Plays the bass ukulele, which is like a regular ukulele but with strings that are STUPID thick
- Used to have mutton chops
- Legit looks like Agent Coulson from Marvel movies
Elder Marler:
- This man lives and thrives off willpower
- Has some of the GNARLIEST quotes I’ve ever heard
- He freakin says “Hot dawg” unironically
- His voice is like a combination of Kronk and an 80-year-old sports announcer
- Watches the same TV shows I did
They’re seriously awesome and I’m glad they’re my companions. Now that that’s outta the way, let’s talk about my week. As far as my usual weeks go, it was pretty dull. I’ll start with landing in Oklahoma, where we met the mission president. He’s old but acts pretty young. So then we loaded up bags and went to the mission home. Signed a wall with all the other OOCM missionaries. (Oklahoma, Oklahoma City Mission) The name is just a waste of time to try and say, so we shorten it to that. Slept there, the day was just blegh.
But then tomorrow, we got up and went to the church. Listened to president talk and then we went to the gym and got our companions. Drove for an hour and a half to the place we’re serving: Lawton 2: Electric Boogaloo. Minus the electric and boogaloo parts. Out of the three of us, nobody had served in Lawton, so we had no clue what we were getting into. We spent the first two days getting through meetings and getting the stuff we needed, and then we met with some people in the ward and tracted a few houses. Tracting is where you just go up and knock on the door and talk to them about the church. Had dinner with some people from the church, and just did some work. Served at this military base called Fort Sill, where we made the troops there breakfast and stuff. The fun stuff only really happens when the three of us can do what we want. And now we talk about the fun stuff.
Up to this point in the email it hasn’t been as interesting as I was hoping it would be, but let’s try and fix that right now o’clock.
So, when we first got to the house, we saw that the missionaries that used to live there left us some stuff. So it became a full on gladiatorial arena, with every man for himself. There was blood, sweat, tears, and pain. Friendships made and alliances broken. After the chaos died down, we each had our own bounties. I had managed to snag the best of the best, which was a pillow, a suit coat, my “Let’s get nauti” shirt, some Christmas mints, Nerf guns and an hourglass. Except it measures in 30 minute increments. Yes I’m taking that with me everywhere I go on my mission. And then we get to the best thing I commandeered in this old shack we live at. So, we saw that the old elders that used to live here threw out some bedding stuff on the top of the trash, and when we were taking beds, I realized I only had sheets for my bed. So I was like, “Yo. I bet you they threw out a blanket. And I’m gonna take that blanket.” And thus we ventured out to the trash can and made like raccoons. And in our efforts, we were rewarded. So, much like King Arthur, I pulled my newfound “Dumpster Blanket” straight outta the trash can triumphantly. Then we made like ER paramedics and rushed that thing to the washing machine. We had about 5 cups of laundry juice left over from the other elders that lived there, so I WATERBOARDED my blanket with every drop I could get outta that thing. Kicked the washer into MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE and just prayed that it could not have 387 different diseases on it. Moved it to the dryer and could HEAR that poor thing just WEEPING as it spun the cloth of catastrophe in it. But yeah, it ended up coming out squeaky clean. It’s like Mjolnir, you have to be worthy in order to not die while sleeping in it. But it is actually clean and it was on TOP of the sheets in the trash. So it was most likely in there for half a day, although I still washed it like I needed to purge devils out of it.
Then another time we were walking back to catch a ride from the sisters in our district and this guy smoking in the front of his house came up to us. So one thing lead to another and… we ended up grabbing hands in a circle as he cried whilst Elder Marler read his Bible notes. Fun times were had by all.
Some other stuff that happened was: Getting Mardi Gras necklaces from this old lady in our ward, my bike tire popping on day 2, me having to purge these goons all Terminator 2 style with my Nerf gun, and getting Elder Marler a pink and white unicorn pillow that says “Believe”.
This email is getting long and I don’t have much to talk about anymore. Sorry it wasn’t as exciting as other ones, but hopefully we can get some crazy things to happen this next week. Also, I can no longer read emails throughout the week, so I have to cram all the reading and writing into Mondays. Thanks for the emails guys, and I’ll try to be more exciting.
Over and Out
Elder Marler:
Elder Spillman:
The pillow:
My hourglass:
My bed and dumpster blanket:
The necklaces:
